How Far is Too Far?

Freelance Friday features a young woman who has some advice for anyone trying to figure out How Far is Too Far???

By: 7-years Holding On :)

Being a single, celibate woman (seven years) is not easy. It does not present you with many long-term relationships. When I think about dating BC and compare it to dating AD my concerns are completely different. I now find myself sitting and waiting for the undesired moment when the man sitting next to me finally makes his move and pounces on me like a panther.

I know it is coming…just not sure when.
It may start with a simple, seemingly innocent gesture like holding hands on date #4…But I know it is coming!
It may progress to a seemingly innocent gesture like me laying my head on his shoulder on date #7.
Yet…I wait, because I know it is coming.
It is date #12 and he has been a perfect gentleman…so far…maybe he is different?
But yet and still…I wait…because it is coming….
Sadly, history has a way of repeating itself…
So, here I go….once again…having to have a talk about celibacy, morals, character and obedience with another brother-in-Christ
Oh well. Another one bites the dust.

You may ask why I would start off with this story. The answer is to simply say “when lust is conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death…spiritually.” Don’t get me wrong I am not a male basher. Women… we must admit that men are not always the ones stirring up sexual tension in relationships. We definitely play our part. Unfortunately, like me many singles have to live and suffer through the consequences of having previously engaged in fornication. The result of previous sin is….current frustration!

My spiritual desire is to live a holy and pure life and abstain from sex until marriage, but my flesh has a different agenda. So, which will I/you choose to obey?

It is not merely enough to say “I am not having sex until I get married.” You must devise a plan and set rules to ensure that you do not fall prey to sexual immorality. So ask yourself the question: how far is too far?

I am currently in year seven of celibacy and guess what…..seven is rough. So I continue to revise my plan, because what was acceptable in year six …just might lead to trouble in seven.

So, how far is too far?
Can we hold hands? I don’t know… can you without it leading to sexual immorality?
Can we cuddle? I don’t know… can you without it leading to sexual immorality?
Can we kiss? I don’t know… can you without it leading to sexual immorality?
Can we lie on separate sides of the bed and go to sleep? Play with fire you eventually get burned!

Sin is progressive. Don’t give way to compromise….compromise will lead you into a compromising situation. Satan wants to sift you like wheat and prove you unfaithful to God. I can say that in seven years I have had a couple of close calls, which forced me to devise a plan of action.

I always say that “the right touch and the wrong moment can cause any single Christian to fall prey to sexual sin.” Know your limitations and boundaries and stay within them….well within them.

So, how far is too far?
Has your conscience been seared to the point that you can go as far as you like without conviction? If so, you have a serious problem.
Has your conscience been seared to the point where things that previously convicted you do not seem to bother you anymore? If so, you are standing on shaky ground.

SIN PROGRESSES
Know your weaknesses…I know mine.
I did not make it seven years because I am strong or lack sexual desires. I made it because I know that I am weak, which forces me to rest in the arms of my Heavenly Father and obey the Holy Spirit.
FLEE FORNICATION!!!! I have had to RUN! Run Forest, Run!

I have not had to run many times, but I will take flight if needed. As I sit here I think back to one of my close calls and laugh at my stupidity. Thank God the TV was on because I was not hearing the Holy Spirit at all that night. At the very moment that I even paid remote attention to the TV the sitcom was showing a church group singing a song that said “Abstain, abstain, abstain.” HILARIOUS…right! God definitely has a sense of humor. He was trying to keep his silly, weak fleshed child from making a horrible decision. I sit here and thinking about that silly TV show singing that silly song at the moment that I was about to make a silly decision. And if it were not for that, my testimony today would probably be different.

As I wrap it up I would like to leave you with some advice….abstain, abstain, abstain.

Proverbs 1:10 (New American Standard Bible)10My son, if sinners entice you, Do not consent.

1 Corinthians 6:17-19 (King James Version)
17But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.
18Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
19What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?

1 Corinthians 15:33
Do not be deceived: "Bad company corrupts good morals."

James 1:13-15 (New American Standard Bible)
13Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone.
14But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust.
15Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.