A Day in the Mind of KP

I have received countless e-mails and comments regarding my personal pursuits of relationship. I would like to first offer-up that over the past several years I had no interest in becoming involved in a relationship. I had been scarred, heart-broken and totally disengaged from the idea of marriage. However, that is where God stepped onto the scene and caused me to check myself. I needed to become comfortable with myself again so that I could be used in a positive way by Him. There was a personal ‘detox’ that needed to take place in my mind, heart and spirit. Fortunately, I opened myself up to Him and let Him have His way in my life. The messages I preach about appreciating your season of singleness come from personal experience. Until you learn how to appreciate yourself, God’s work in you and the purpose He has for you, you will never achieve the abundant life He desires for you. My personal time away from relationships has allowed me to become proficient in analyzing, evaluating and counseling people through their issues. Five years of isolation and years of selfish relationship allowed me to formulate my current theory of What NOT-to-DO. You are simply beneficiaries of years of research and bad decisions made by my friends as well as myself.

I created this blog to help people build effective and healthy relationships and restore Kingdom families. I do not want anyone thinking that Chat Kafe with KP is my personal platform to boast and promote myself. Life is too short for egos and personal selfishness. Our society is decaying relationally at an alarming rate. I am tired of seeing relationships fail because two broken people try to come together as a solution to their issues. I am tired of seeing selfishness serve as the catalyst of destroying marriages. I am tired of children having to endure the pain of being separated like personal assets because their parents were unwilling to workout their personal differences. Those children end up harboring pain in their hearts and transfer the pain into future relationships. Enough is enough!!!

I want to serve as a vessel to promoting and building a foundation to healthy relationships. My perspectives may seem radical at times and that is okay. Vision allows me to see something that others cannot. My vision desires the following:

 More men and women desiring monogamous committed relationships
 More unmarried men and women serving in the Kingdom and in the community
 More men and women focused on giving to others rather than taking for themselves
 More open public communication about relationship issues

 No more failed marriages due to irreconcilable differences
 No more hurt women at the hands of irresponsible men
 No more children growing up in single parent households
 No more unhealthy relationships because of ignorance

Let me also dispel a misconception that is floating around about how I have everything together in my life relationally. I have allowed myself to appear perfect, untouchable and I sometimes put up the façade that I don’t love, hurt, laugh or desire happiness like everyone else. This perspective could not be farther from the truth. I have made some relational mistakes in life…even during my ministerial tenure. I am a very private person and often keep these things to myself or within my circle of accountability partners (notice…I said my accountability partners). This means that I too have an outside support group that helps me sort through my personal relationship dilemmas when I cannot come to a clear understanding on my own. Just because I coach people doesn’t mean that I don’t need to be coached. It is easier to see clearly outside of a situation than when you are in the middle of it.

For those of you who are interested in how I’m pursuing a ‘good woman’, understand that there are many good women out in the world. I have contemplated and considered approaching a few of the good women I know personally. However, as I often preach…there is a difference between a ‘good woman’ and the ‘good woman for me.’ I have stepped out of my comfort zone and only time will tell if the ‘good woman for me’ has already been found ;). Peace and blessings to you!