Workplace topic of the week…
Someone posed an interesting thought that I felt was relevant to my most recent post ‘What’s the deal with married men?’ This question was posed by a young woman so please don’t think this is something I personally generated. However, I totally agree with the perspective she shared via e-mail.
I posted a write-up some time ago about how men are the cause for many of the relationship issues that we are reaping in today’s society. It is because of our (men’s) selfish choices of making babies and not maturing/parenting these children, that has led us to such a significant amount of drama in modern-day relationships.
Imagine if casual sex had minimized/stopped in the early 1980’s and 90’s and men remained a part of the family household. Would we have the same issues many of the sons and daughters are now experiencing in relationships today? Of course not! Check out a couple of the outcomes of our fatherless generation…
• Some of our fatherless women would not have to experiment on how to attract and retain the attention of a man because an example would have been present in the household. An at-home father could have helped her decipher through the foolishness of today’s playboys.
• Some of our fatherless women would not demonstrate such an intense attempt at using physical assets (no pun intended) to lure a man in hopes of making them a husband. Physical intimacy never correlates to long-term happiness!
• Some fatherless women would avoid being swayed by subtle hints of flattery and remain focused on the character of men. You can truly tell the character of someone after the honeymoon season in your interaction passes and you go through seasonal experiences together. Remember relationships fluctuate and not every day will be a happy day.
• Some fatherless men would not have to rely on his male organ as the source of his manhood and recognize/appreciate the value of what TRUE unconditional relationships hold. Because men have lacked male examples to follow, we have resorted to societal views, media and our personal experiences to assist with the learning process. As a result, we have created a relational pattern of seek and conquer versus love and patience. (I through this blurb in for the men so this entry wouldn’t be so one-sided ).
Back to the main topic at hand…here are the questions this young lady posed to me:
1. How do women who were raised in fatherless household view relationships?
2. Do they seek companionship from a man to fill voids? Once they learned that God is their father, did it change the way they looked at men?
Of course I have my personal thoughts on each of the above questions, but will resist the temptation of responding prematurely.
If you are a woman who grew up in a fatherless household, your perspective is definitely solicited. If you know of either positive or negative stories because of a fatherless environment, please post your responses too. You can always post anonymously if you wish to protect your identity.