Relationships - Greenhouses and Cheerleaders?

Recently I posted a message on my Facebook page that stated women should be like cheerleaders and men should be like greenhouses. Let me now explain this statement further.

I recently had an opportunity to hear a message by Jimmie Evans (www.marriagetoday.org) who was discussing marriage and healthy roles for each spouse to play. The role associations given for success in marriage were that of a greenhouse and cheerleader. Initially this statement caused some confusion, but let’s explore in detail. The following is based on my interpretation on what was shared during Jimmie Evans’ message.


A greenhouse is a structure that provides a controlled atmosphere, gives shelter against outside elements and transmits a proper amount of sun and nutrients conducive for growth and bearing of fruit. Likewise, a man or husband should always provide a controlled atmosphere for a relationship because he has the ability to calm down situations that cause anxiety, and inject optimism into situations that seem challenging. Reflecting on my childhood, I always remember my father being the thermostat in our household. My mother, brother and I could be in the best of moods. However, if my father was upset when he got home from work, all of our moods were altered because of his lead. Conversely, my father also had the ability to bring happiness into an environment that seemed depressing or sad. A man should also serve as protection for his wife and family against outside influences and opposition. No matter what others are saying or what is taking place at school, a wife and children should always feel like the husband/father will protect or take up for them. Correction for inappropriate behavior or improper decisions may take place in the background, but no one outside of the immediate family should be able to attack (physically or verbally) a member of a man’s family without a fight (not literally). Finally, a man must provide proper nutrients and sunlight conducive to bearing fruit. This speaks specifically to a man’s ability to sow seeds into his family. If a man desires his family to grow and prosper, then he should sow continuous seeds of 1) Fear of God, 2) love, 3) integrity, 4) discipline and 5) wisdom.


As the helpmeet of a man, a woman in a successful marriage is called to be like a cheerleader. In a society where the pressure to protect and provide traditionally falls on the shoulders of men, a helpmeet should always be willing to cheer her man on to victory. All the independent women may interject at this point to offer a point of interest about their ability to provide for the family too. I do not object to this point because many of today’s women are able to contribute to the household needs. However, most men do not marry solely because a woman is able to contribute financially. Most men marry because they find a woman who they believe supports them wholeheartedly and encourages them to accomplish great things. A woman’s role is characterized with being a cheerleader because cheerleaders cheer no matter what is taking place during a sporting event. It’s amazing that when my Ohio State Buckeyes were losing in their football bowl game, you could still see the cheerleaders cheering even though the losing outcome had already been decided. Cheerleaders are charged to provide motivation when times get tough and the team feels like quitting. Cheerleaders celebrate when successes and victories occur, but also provide encouragement when things seem a little bleak. Likewise, women should do the same in the lives their men. Men are programmed to accomplish things and pursue goals and victories. Men need a source of encouragement when life doesn’t seem to be working out for them. Unfortunately, modern-day relationships have transitioned from being a support network to being a battle for position and attention. One of my buddies suggested that I blog one day about ways to determine if you are a helpmeet or a hindrance meet.

The truth is, a woman’s financial contributions are not enough to offset internal relationship discord. However, a woman’s support and encouragement is enough to persevere through times when relationships endure challenges. The last place a man wants to encounter opposition is at home. Likewise, the last thing a woman wants is a man who doesn’t protect and provide for her needs.
Men, work toward becoming awesome greenhouses and ladies, work toward becoming the best cheerleaders you can be. It’s an awesome result when the two roles come together as one!

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